>I don’t find myself predictably profound or witty. I am not highly educated, I only have a few semesters of college. I am not particular ignorant, but I am not anything extraordinary. During the time that I would have been going to college right after high school life happened (and I survived surprisingly to many), then Donnie happened and following Donnie, six blessings happened, they are my children. I am in every since of the words ‘just a mom’. That is ok with me today, I am pleased. WE often are asked why we have such a big family, what were we thinking, how can you afford them, how will they go to college and when will you be able to retire? I don’t know, I am unsure, we weren’t thinking, and college and retirement will happen at some point. We didn’t either one think about having this many children, but they are a blessing. WE trusted God, the universe, what ever you choose to say and for that we were blessed. We have had struggles that have been out in the open and in your face. WE have not lived a neat tidy politically correct life, we have been messy to have as friends or family. We have lost friends and family and frankly better for it. WE have gained friends and built new relationships with other family and better for it. Our children are blessings all of them, everyone of them, the healthy and unhealthy, the happy and unhappy, the toddler and the teenager, the whiny ones and the complacent ones, the children who learned to read easily and the ones who haven’t all of them. I adore them. I feel sorry for those who don’t adore their on children or see how great ours are. I pity those who think because of where we go to church or how we choose to educate that they are better than children. I am sad for those who don’t call and enjoy their voices or stop by and see them because they may seem to talk fast or move a lot. I like fast talkers and busyness, I am grateful they can talk and run and touch things and oh yea…..breathe. There was a time, and admittedly many moments in my current days where I see myself as just an under appreciated overworked mom, but by and large I know that what I haven’t been able to do or measure up to, God has done without any worry. The answers I have to the criticism or the hurt that children, mine and others get every day aren’t always eloquent, but they are passionate and I do believe in what I do. What I do every day is whole hearted, hands dirty, swallowing my pride, saying I am sorry or asking for help when I need it parenting. I will engage myself in other people’s messy parenting when a friend and hands are needed. I won’t call a committe or wonder what someone can do to help themselves or advise them to quit having children, I will pledge to do what ever I can to never forget these days, the yesterdays and the ones to come. I will try to keep in mind marker on walls, critical care with a new born, messy beds, stomach virus, negative diagnosis, marriage struggles, and restoration. I promise to listen and not be afraid to share or show my inperfections. I won’t clean my house before another mom comes over, no body needs to think I live like that every moment. Life is messy and I will share other folks mess, mine and theirs. Today I am just a mom, I am blessed, I am happy and I am proud. I wasn’t prepared for the work, or the pain, I was least prepared for the attack on our character and our faith, but I am full of hope and ready to do what ever needs to be done. I may cry, I may fuss, I may laugh, I may cook, and clean or go back and get a degree….I may loose everything or get more than I ever imagined, but my husband made me a momma. He saw more than anyone else and knew I was up for the job of being a momma. I am just a mom, just a mom, just a mom, just a mom.. Move it around in your mouth, think about it, say it out loud and be proud. I am.
Happy Mother’s Day

>”Laugh at yourself because I am probably already laughing at you,” that is what a dear friend said to me this week. It is friends like this that keep me on my toes…..laughing. We all need friends who are not afraid to laugh at us and with us and we all need to be willing to be laughed at. Sometimes our life from the rest of the world’s vantage point is just plain funny. I have know this for a while, but I am afraid that some people are still taken aback when I laugh at myself or them. You see, I just can’t be serious about picking out new paint, the state of my checking account or the silly thing that came out of my child’s mouth, when I remind myself how much God has redeemed me from and the life I was delivered from. I believe that pain gives us the later gift of laughter. Can I get an AMEN? I was recently confronted with a false accusation I can tell you that I laughed out loud? Well I did, I laughed out loud, because I have done so dern many things wrong, offensive and sinful in my short life that were so out loud and in your face that to be accused of doing something that so would take so much thought made me laugh. There has been a time in my life that I would have cried, manipulated or tried to change this persons mind about what they thought, but on this day I would have none of that. The word of God says to agree quickly with the enemy and that He (God) will be our justification and that he will contend with them (those who are trying to hurt you or trap you), it says so look for yourself in Psalms 35. If God wanted to save the life of David don’t you think he cares if we are being falsely accused. You can laugh and find joy, that is the beauty of it, we don’t have to take up arms or change anyone’s mind. We don’t have to manipulate or adjust a situation so that it will be in our favor, God is our favor. This doesn’t mean that bad things won’t happen, we are promised they will (more on that later, maybe), but we can laugh…ie-find joy even it. Think about that, don’t be so serious, don’t work so hard, don’t care so much what others think, let them laugh and laugh at your self. Remember if you are a friend I may already be laughing at you.